As most of you know, Wes and I have had combined finances, lived together, and owned a home together for quite some time. Because of this, we have always been very open with our finances and our spending habits.
Thing is, we are completely different when it comes to finances.
I am a crazy saver.
I've talked about this before in Confession: I Let Money Control My Life. I compulsively check our financial accounts, we have a large emergency fund, I always think about our financial goals before we spend money, and so on.
Wes on the other hand, is a spender.
He knows how to use money to have fun and enjoy life. He plans fun trips and fun ways to spend his money, and he doesn't worry or wonder about every little purchase.
When in a spender and a saver relationship, below are different areas you may want to think about:
I think spenders and savers can make a great match.
I think me and Wes (financially) make a great match BECAUSE I am a saver and he is a spender. Some would say that a saver with a saver, or a spender with a spender is a better idea because there will be less conflict, but I just don't agree with that.
Instead, we each are learning and growing from each other and together.
I have taught him that saving can be a good thing. We have financial goals and we keep each other in check so that we can reach them. He understands the importance of saving and how it can help us.
He has taught me that money can be enjoyed as well. If it weren't for him, I would probably not be enjoying life at all because I would be agonizing about every little penny. While that may work for some, I believe that life is meant to be enjoyed. He helps me live life more!
Be open about your finances.
If you have opposite spending/saving habits, then I always think it's best to be open and communicate about your finances. You might want to have routine money talks, discussions about “allowances,” and more.
In your talks, you might want to discuss why each of you are the way you are, how much debt the other has or has had in the past, and what your long-term goals are.
Don't hide money.
Whether you are the saver or the spender in the relationship, some might try to hide money in their relationship. According to a survey done by CreditCards.com, around 7% of those they surveyed were hiding money from their significant other. Most of them either have a secret credit card or a secret savings account.
The saver might try to hide money so that the spender can't spend it. They might lie about how much money is saved or how much money they currently have so that the other person has less “access” to spending the money.
The spender might try to hide money so that they can have more money to spend at a later time. They might rack up credit card debt on the side so that they can still spend money.
I think having a secret account can be devastating to a relationship. This is something you definitely do not want to do. How would you feel if you found out your significant other had hidden money or hidden debt?
I'm going to assume that would not be the greatest feeling…
Maybe having a separate account is what you need.
For some, having separate financial accounts may be what you need. I know of a few different couples who have separate finances and wouldn't have it any other way.
This way each person is in charge of their own finances.
Are you the spender or the saver in your relationship?
What do you do to make it work?
P.S. Please come back tomorrow. I have a Reader Question going live tomorrow and this reader needs your help.
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