Hello! Today I have a post written by a blog friend. Enjoy!
“But everyone has debt!” Is something I used to tell myself when I couldn’t sleep at night.
“Debt is normal!” I said to myself when I was rationalizing the expensive purchase of something
I didn’t truly need.
“I’ll get out of debt someday!” I’d say when I felt stressed by the growing balances on my credit card statements.
If you are in debt, don’t make these same mistakes I did. Here’s what NOT to do about your debt from someone who made all of these mistakes personally.
Don’t Give in to the “I Deserves” or the “I wants”
Just because you work hard does not mean you “deserve” those $300 shoes or that $2,000 vacation. What you deserve to do is keep working hard to pay off your debts and then save for those splurges.
Likewise, just because you want something doesn’t mean you should buy it, especially if you are in debt.
Controlling these urges is something you’ll thank yourself for later! It’s better to wait and work for it than finance it and pay big bucks in interest for years to come.
Don’t Ignore your Growing Balances
Every time a credit card statement would come in the mail, I’d have a mini-heart attack and would put off opening the statement as long as possible.
I was dreading seeing how high the balance had climbed since last month. Luckily, I didn’t take ignoring my debts to the extreme that some do. I did open all my statements and pay all my bills, I just didn’t like doing it.
Now that I’m making progress at eliminating my debts, I won’t say I enjoy opening my bills, but it is nice to see that balances going down each month.
Don’t Keep Spending Like Nothing is Wrong
This goes along with the first one. Once you are in debt and you’ve admitted it to yourself, you have to slow down your spending to minimize the damage. I didn’t do this until I had hit rock bottom.
If you take measures to slow down your spending you can at least lessen the damage you have done by getting into debt. Stop spending, sit down and figure out where all your money is going.
Once you know, make a reasonable budget you can stick to month in and month out. My budget fluctuates a bit from month to month based on what I have going on each month, but the basis of the budget is the same each month.
Don’t Blindly Follow Advice from the Experts
Ever since I’ve admitted my debt situation to myself, I’ve been like a sponge: absorbing anything and everything I can find about how to get out of debt. There are lots of methods and lots of stories out there, you don’t have to follow advice from just the most popular PF authors, in fact I recommend you don’t.
I’m glad I took the time to find out more about alternate methods rather than just blindly following the first advice I stumbled upon (which was Dave Ramsey by the way). While I agree with some of the advice from big name PF authors, I know everyone’s situation is different and thus I think everyone needs to follow the path that fits them best.
In the end, the basics of what to do and what not to do are the same. Admit your debt and take whatever steps are necessary to rid yourself of it, once and for all!
What did you learn NOT to do about your debt?
Shoeaholicnomore is a mid-20s single girl living in the Midwest. She is focused on paying off her consumer and student loans, while simplifying her life and closet. You can join her on her journey at Shoeaholicnomore.
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Christine Berry - Wealth Way Online says
I learned to actually appreciate the amount you’re taking in debt is real money! Sounds stupid, but I was 17 when I started my lovely student loan. I never saw the money, so it never felt real. Now, some 9 years later, with $30,000 owing it feels pretty real.
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
That is a good point. Sometimes when I “swipe” my card, even my debit card, it doesn’t really feel “real”.
FI Pilgrim says
I second the “experts” section– there is just as much bad advice as good out there, and it needs to be evaluated not just with logic and common sense, but with your own goals and plans in mind. Not everyone wants to work ‘9 to 5 until 65’…
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
That is a great point Pilgrim! Everyone’s goals and personal situations are different. It’s important to keep these in mind when making decisions regarding debt repayment, savings, and really any financial decisions 🙂
Holly@ClubThrifty says
I agree with this post 100%. I was in debt in my 20’s and I did all of those things- just kept digging until it got worse. The only way to get out of debt is to pay it off!
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
That is exactly what I’ve decided too Holly!
John @ Frugal Rules says
This post is spot on! When I was in debt I did the whole ignore the statement game as well as just spending like I didn’t have a problem. It just got worse until I finally woke up to the issue. Excellent point on the experts issue as well! Each situation is unique and you need to do what is right for your given situation. As long as it gets the debt paid off, assuming it’s legal of course 😉 , then run with it.
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
I finally decided that I needed to stop playing the statement game and face my debt, now I sleep better at night since I’m not sweating and stressing about not knowing how much $$ I have.
Michelle S. says
We used to always buy things because we thought we “deserved” it after a long hard day at work. It was bad, and some months we were spending a ridiculous amount of money!
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
I still have this mentality occasionally. It’s a tough one to break!
Nicola says
This is a great post – I think the “not ignoring” thing is so important. We got into the habit of treating ourselves because we deserved it after a hard day – not any more! We were spending quite a bit unnecessarily.
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
Treating yourself because you “deserve” it is ok, I think, as long as you can ACTUALLY afford it and not put it on credit that you can’t pay off immediately.
The Stoic says
For most of my adult life I did the exact opposite of what you have listed here and I can safely say that behavior is what contributed to me accumulating 50k in various debts. Having eliminated all of the debts has made life much easier, but it took learning a completely different mind set to overcome it.
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
Yes, it is a different mindset. I’m realizing that the futher I get into this journey to pay off my debts and it is sure hard sometimes. Changing your mindset is a tough one for sure.
Amy says
Great post. This is very obvious, but I really had to confront the fact that my credit card debt is money that I had actually borrowed. Somehow looking at it that way has been more motivating to me.
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
Yes! Lots of people say that when paying with “plastic” it doesn’t really feel like you are spending real money. But the truth is, you are!
Aldo says
I used to do the same thing. Just ignore and keep living my life. But ignoring it didn’t really make my debts go away.
The only way to get rid of debt is to Get Rid Of Debt.
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
This is certainly the bottom line. Only you can get rid of your debts.
Squirrelers says
Very good points. I like how you added the “experts” point, as it’s so true these days. So many people are able to speak definitively, using a platform like a blog, twitter, etc to share recommendations that are suspect. Best to get a variety of perspectives and consider sources.
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
Yes! I decided that if I was going to seriously consider getting out of debt, I needed “advice” from multiple sources not just one popular PF “expert”. So, I sought out lots of sources, including PF blogs.
RJ says
Excellent post Kayla!
I especially agree with your last point about blindly following the advice of the experts. While I agree that you must get rid of your debts ASAP, Dave Ramsey’s suggestion to do it at the expense of your retirement contributions is pretty bad. As we all know those retirement vehicles are of the “use it or lose it” ilk. You can always throw money at debt at anytime, not so with your retirement, once the yearly deadline passes you can never put money in them anymore, which can turn to many thousands of dollars you’ll be missing out on in the future.
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
I decided not to follow that bit of advice. I couldn’t give up the matching contribution of my employer along with the compounding interest! That’s a lot of money to give away by stopping my retirement contributions. I decided to continue contributing, but not increase my contributions this year. (I usually increase them by 1% each year.)
Daniel says
Great points! I agree about not blindly following “expert” advice. In fact, I’d add to not get paralyzed by the overwhelming amount of expert advice out there. The basics of having debt are simple: You need to start earning more money than you spend. All the other advice just helps you get to that point.
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
That’s a great point Daniel! I never thought about it, but yes there is an overwhelming amount of advice out there and not all of it is good, though the basics are the same. Thanks for pointing that out!
Kayla @ Shoeaholicnomore says
Having to face the fact that your parents, siblings, and close friends are the ones who are your “Joneses” is tough. I’m glad you realized that.
kevin watts says
You can say that debts is such a burden, but you have to realize that it was what solves your problem before(financial). Debt is not a joke and it is recommended that you should never try to forget it. Michelle is right, you should not ignore debts.