Warning – It's about to get serious up in here. This post is meant to get a rise in people, and make you think.
I don't think that there is anything wrong with saving money (of course, this is a personal finance blog), but I do wonder how far people will go to save money – whether it be $1 or $2 or a few hundred dollars.
No one is perfect, and I definitely am not. However, when does frugality or cheapness cross the line and become stealing?
Clearing out a hotel room.
Have you ever stayed at a hotel and cleared the room out? Maybe you took the towels, soap, toilet paper, plates, cups, decorations, and so on.
Yes, I have taken ONE disposable item before – one time I stayed at a hotel and they had really “fancy” face wash that I knew was over $50 at the store. This was a smaller size and I already used some of it.
I took the rest of the (very small) bottle and brought it home. I figured it would be tossed anyways so why not just take it with me?
I have told people about this before though, and I sometimes I get looks as though I were an alien and I just told people I just came here from Jupiter. I don't get what's so weird about it.
Complaining excessively to get what you want.
Would you ever complain so much to get what you want, even if it meant that someone would get fired? I used to work in retail, and I saw this at my job and I also see this when I am out shopping at other places (if at any point you used to work in retail, you start to notice how retail workers at other stores are treated by customers).
Sometimes people will lie, call others names, yell, and just be all around mean.
Yes, yes, I know, you should always treat the customer as though they are right.
But, I have seen this happen multiple times with customers. When I am out and I see this happening, I do my best to defend the employee (if the employee is correct, let's be honest – the employee isn't always right either), because I just CANNOT stand it when people lie.
To get back to the topic – A customer will make a complaint so that they can get a discount even if it means that they have to lie and get workers fired.
There were many times when a complaint would come in, and I knew it was completely a lie – the employee that they were talking about didn't even work the day that the customer was complaining about, or they were talking to me (without knowing it) and claiming that I did something that I knew I did not.
Many times it even came to the point where I have seen employees run away and cry because of how adamant some people are about getting a discount.
Usually these fake complaints were followed with “Don't I get a discount or get it for FREE?!”
Using an item and then returning it.
Have you ever seen the episode of King of Queens where Carrie starts “buying” a lot of high-end designer clothing and has a room full of it? There are thousands of dollars worth of clothing, and she has a system of buying and returning all of them so that she never actually has to pay for the items.
Another example of this is if an item of your breaks, and you buy the exact same item from the store. You then put the broken item in the box and return that one, and in return have a working item again at no cost to you.
I also know of someone who threw their laptop down the stairs to break it, because their warranty was about to be up and they wanted a new laptop. They said that they bought the warranty, so this was not stealing.
The movie theater.
Recently, I was talking to a group of people about the high costs of movie theaters. We were talking about whether it was considered stealing if a person brings their own food or drinks into a movie theater.
A few people gasped and said that they would never bring food or drinks into a movie theater because they considered it stealing.
Or, maybe you bought a child or senior ticket before at the movie theater (people do this by buying the tickets online or at one of those kiosks next to the ticket line) and entered that way.
Leaving a bad tip because you don't have enough money.
The other day I was doing research for an article, and I got caught up reading the comments in the article. This happens a lot – many times the comment section of an article is my entertainment for the day. The things that some people say can be entertaining.
The article was about the correct amount of tip to leave for certain services that a person receives. I know that different countries have different tipping rules, but if you are in the U.S. where the service industry relies on tips, then I think that you should be budgeting a tip into the service that you are receiving.
If you cannot afford the tip (lets completely disregard whether the service was great or not, for the sake of simplicity, I am talking about good customer service), then to me that means that you cannot afford the service, and you should budget accordingly and go with a cheaper service or item.
I know someone who constantly leaves a $1 tip (and sometimes less) on everything, regardless if it's a $20 meal or a $50 night out. It really bothers me, and usually I make up for it by over tipping for this person whenever we are out together. This person has the money, but they choose to be cheap instead.
Anyways, back to the point, the person leaving the comment on the article I was talking about said that they have no problem leaving only a 5% tip each time they go out (even if the service is phenomenal) because that's all they can afford, and that they still have a right to eat out even if they can't afford to tip on their bill.
Have you ever done any of the above? What do you think of these situations?
What other examples can you think of?
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Amanda @ Passionately Simple Life says
March 18, 2014 at 7:39 amI always hate leaving a half used item in the the hotel room knowing that it’s going to get thrown out. If it’s opened and I know I’ll finish it up in the next day or two, I’ll take it so as to reduce the waste. But apart from that, there’s really no reason to take anything if I packed properly.
One thing I’ve noticed is the people who complain about employees and are asking for free things are the ones who complain and don’t tip at restaurants. They believe they deserve all these things for free. There’s nothing you can do but know that they will never be happy…
Michelle S. says
March 18, 2014 at 11:28 amI agree Amanda. The people who do fake complaints are often cheap all around and will do whatever it takes to get free items.
Mike says
March 18, 2014 at 8:14 amI don’t see the problem with taking the disposable items from a hotel room, the remaining bottle of shampoo, lotion, and such. It’s all going to get thrown out anyway by the maid service and replaced with an unopened one for the new guest.
I admit, I do call customer service when there’s a problem with my bill and always ask for some kind of compensation for my time. For instance, my phone bill was screwed up for several months in a row ager calling in each month to get it corrected. Of course, I asked for some statement credit for compensation for my time.
Michelle S. says
March 18, 2014 at 11:29 amI don’t think there’s anything wrong if the company actually made a mistake and you ask for compensation for your time. I do that all the time. I think it’s wrong when customers try to bully employees for a discount though and lie about things.
For example, I once had a customer say that I hit them (when I absolutely did not, especially since I wasn’t even working the day they claimed it happened), and they wanted a free shirt to make up for it. LOL WHAT A CRAZY PERSON
Daisy says
March 18, 2014 at 10:42 amI always bring stuff into the movie theater. I wouldn’t spend $10 on popcorn anyway so it’s not as if bringing something in is making them lose my business. I don’t think that is stealing. I have also taken toiletries from hotels (shampoo, conditioner, etc) if I have already used them but those are built I to the price of the room so I don’t see that as stealing either. I don’t think not leaving a tip is stealing though I wouldn’t feel very good about it if I couldn’t leave one.
Michelle S. says
March 18, 2014 at 11:32 amI always bring stuff into the movie theater too. It seems like all of us pf bloggers do 🙂
Ray @ Squirrelers says
March 18, 2014 at 12:53 pmGood topic! I think that in many cases the line is clear when it comes to frugality vs. lack of ethics, but sometimes it can be blurry to some people because they want it to be that way. Makes them feel better about things 🙂
Example: taking a small bottle of shampoo from the hotel room seems okay, taking blankets or other reusable things would be unethical. At restaurants, leaving a $1 tip on a $5 meal is okay, but leaving $1 on a $20 meal is clearly not. Doesn’t matter if the work done took the same effort, it’s not how things are done in society.
I’d say that if a person is doing something they wouldn’t want broadcast to the world, they probably aren’t meant to be doing it.
Michelle S. says
March 19, 2014 at 8:23 amSounds like we have the same thinking about things Ray. Thanks for stopping by!
sharon says
March 18, 2014 at 1:06 pmBringing in your own food to the movie theatre is just smart. (Although I can’t resist their popcorn!) I used to bring in a diet soda and an air-popped bag of popcorn when I was trying to lose weight. I’ve already paid for the ticket, I just didn’t choose to get gauged on the snacks. Not stealing in my opinion.
Michelle S. says
March 19, 2014 at 8:24 amI agree Sharon!
Tara @ Streets Ahead Living says
March 18, 2014 at 2:04 pmI am a member of a mostly volunteer food coop with minimal paid staff. As such, I must volunteer 2.75 hours every four weeks. I’m going to miss my next shift so I did a make up shift this past weekend in a different department, working with returns. There are BIG signs by the books at the Coop saying that they don’t accept returns or exchanges. A women came in, with a receipt dated from 15 days prior, saying she “bought it on accident” and this was the soonest she could return it. On top of it all, she had spent $300 at the food coop so it’s not like she’s low on cash (the food coop is in a rich, gentrified neighborhood). So she really “accidentally” purchased it and only realized 15 days later, even though we don’t have bags at the coop so she packed her own purchases in her own bags? I lol’ed.
Also, the tipping thing gets me so angry. If you can’t afford to tip, go to a QUICK SERVICE restaurant. There are PLENTY. Go to Qdoba or Subway for Pete’s sake! At least they make minimum wage or higher at those restaurants.
Michelle S. says
March 19, 2014 at 8:26 amLOL the story about the woman is funny.
Frugal(er) says
March 18, 2014 at 2:43 pmAnother personal finance blogger who I used to read (no longer) mentioned that she and her husband went to Panera and brought in their own cream cheese. They weren’t getting bagels to go or anything, they just thought the cream cheese prices were too high and brought in something cheaper.
That is stealing, for sure.
Hotel mini items = not stealing, but the rest of your list–egads! I do bring a can of seltzer to the movies usually, because they don’t have it, but we almost always buy popcorn, so I don’t feel bad. Thankfully when I was in retail, I never had to deal with anyone yelling or lying to get a discount, but reading that makes me just sad.
Michelle S. says
March 19, 2014 at 8:27 amI’m jealous that you didn’t have to deal with that when you worked in retail. It completely ruined the job for me because it happened so often.
Ryan @ Impersonal Finance says
March 18, 2014 at 4:17 pmI do everything but return items, treat people poorly, and leave a bad tip because I don’t have the money. If I don’t have the money for the entire bill (which is now never), I simply wouldn’t go out to eat. But I don’t have a problem with taking the mini shampoos or conditioners from a hotel, or bringing my own snacks into a movie theatre. The markup on those theatre candies is outrageous, and I’m paying for the cost of viewing the film, really, in my eyes. I won’t hesitate to speak with a manager or customer service if something is amiss in the store or with my bill, but I always remember I’m dealing with actual humans and treat them as such. Nothing is more disgusting to me than treating people like shit just because you think you’re above them because of the position they have at somewhere you shop.
Michelle S. says
March 19, 2014 at 8:27 amYes, I simply wouldn’t go out to eat either. I don’t know why some people think they have the right to tip poorly.
Marvin says
March 18, 2014 at 7:59 pmI have taken food into the movie theatre and still do. I don’t consider it stealing, in fact I carry a coffee right by the attendants!
Michelle S. says
March 19, 2014 at 8:32 amYeah, I’ve never been stopped either 🙂
Dear Debt says
March 18, 2014 at 10:02 pmI’ve totally brought my own candy to the movie theaters and taken the toiletries from a hotel. I wouldn’t buy something and take it back though. I’m also too nice to complain a lot just to get something! As someone that has sampled a lot of food, I can’t stand when people take like 5 samples, come back for more, and try to act like they are someone new. Give me a break!
Carlos @ TheFrugalWeds says
March 19, 2014 at 12:58 amI only take the shampoo/soap/lotion from hotels if they are particularly nice quality. As for linens or towels, I think that is too far. Movie theaters rip us off with inflated costs on everything so I do not feel bad if I bring in my own snack or water.
I do have an example of one of the worst cases of crossing the line. I attended a Christmas party at a hotel that had a buffet lunch. When everyone was done eating, one of the party hosts pulled out giant zip lock bags and began filling them all up. Not that I agree here, but entrees were packed which makes sense I guess. Then the lady started packing up the crappy bread rolls, the romaine lettuce, and…salad dressing. Yes she was packing up a half gallon of caesar salad dressing!
Frugal(er) says
March 19, 2014 at 11:17 amSalad dressing!? That’s just crazy behavior. In her defense, that food would just be thrown away, so if I had the foresight to bring a bag to put it in, I might have taken some too (after people left).
Cathie says
March 19, 2014 at 10:38 amI didn’t read all of the comments, so forgive me if what I say has already been said. We sometimes bring food into a movie theater, but my son has allergies, and we do not eat anything that the theater has to offer. We usually go without food in the theater, and eat later. I am torn about this, because I think that movie theaters are really high-priced concession stands that happen to show a movie while you’re munching. They make their money on those concessions. I think if I brought in food that they sold I would probably consider that stealing.
Also, if I am staying in a hotel for multiple nights, I would consider it stealing if I packed away my shampoo and soap on a daily basis and received a new one each day. That’s just me.
Shannon @ The Heavy Purse says
March 19, 2014 at 12:18 pmWow – throwing your laptop down the stairs is … extreme! I have no problem returning something I just bought that doesn’t work but I am upfront about it, so (hopefully) it doesn’t go back out on the shelves for some innocent person to purchase. I would never buy a duplicate item and put the broken item in to get a refund. When people buy clothes to wear once and return it is so wrong! Nobody, including someone who probably does this, wants to wear clothes that others have truly worn and returned without washing. Wrong on so many levels. And I do agree that if you cannot afford a reasonable tip, then you shouldn’t eat at place where the wait staff depend on those tips. Eat somewhere that doesn’t require tips. I do think it’s wrong to take linens, etc from hotels but I don’t have a problem if you take a bottle of shampoo or lotions that you’ve already used. I’m pretty sure they toss them if they look used, so you might as well take it.
Kim@Eyesonthedollar says
March 19, 2014 at 12:46 pmI have done the sneak snacks into a movie before but stopped after my daughter asked why I had to hide them. It was not a good example even if it did save money. I think if you can’t leave at least a 15-20% tip you shouldn’t go out to eat or at least don’t complain if someone spits in your food.
Andrea says
March 19, 2014 at 3:44 pmI never go to the movies, I prefer watching them in English and almost all films shown on Germany are dubbed. It’s much more fun renting it off iTunes while munching reasonably priced chocolate, homemade salsa and organic nacho chips 😀 I used to watch TV shows online and download music (that was years ago when I was still at school) but since I started working in the music business I also started buying everything. I share it with my boyfriend, though. And I don’t consider that stealing.
People will go a long way for free stuff/ saving cents. It annoys me.
We also have a healthy tipping mentality and enjoy watching our friends tag along 😀
Standing up for others is a quality you find in very few people, so sad. In fifth grade some of my peers tried to convince our (not very much liked) teacher that she hadn’t informed us about a test she was going to set us. When in fact she had. I felt bad for the girl that got an F but simply couldn’t stand by and watch them tell lies. Needless to say they hates me afterwards but…
Good night from Germany, I do love your blog 🙂
Andrea
KK @ Student Debt Survivor says
March 19, 2014 at 5:32 pmI’ve really enjoyed reading through these comments. Very interesting to say the least. I take used samples of shampoo and lotion from the hotel, but wouldn’t ask for extra just to take with me. The way I see it, I paid for the room and the toiletries are part of the room that I paid for (in my opinion). But I’d never take a towel or a blanket or any part of the room that wasn’t meant for me to keep/I didn’t pay for.
Taylor Gordon says
March 22, 2014 at 11:12 amOoooo this is a FUN topic!!! There’s definitely a fine line between cheap and frugal. Not going to lie sometimes I cross it. 🙂 I’ve brought McDonalds to a movie in the past, next time I’ll think twice!
I’ve worked in the hospitality industry so for me leaving no or low tip is stealing. Stealing the time, effort, and table that a server could be offering to another customer.
Deia @ Nomad Wallet says
March 23, 2014 at 8:05 pmAwesome topic! I definitely bring snacks into movie theaters. The prices there are just ridiculous! This is easy enough to do here in Canada, but a little tip if you’re traveling to Asia: some places do bag checks. I’ve been caught with a burger once in Singapore. I hadn’t had any lunch and had to leave the burger with the staff until after the movie. I was hungry the whole movie!
Emma @ emmalincoln.com says
July 14, 2014 at 2:32 pmOOooo, this article is fun! It made me think of all sorts of dilemmas…
Like, what about taking home pens, or paper clips, or notebooks from work? What about doing scanning or printing for personal reasons at work?
What about when somebody rings something up wrong, or doesn’t ring up something in your cart at the grocery store? I always say something because I don’t want them to get in trouble. BUT, if I’m already home, I don’t drive back to the store.
What about you guys?
Lindsay says
January 3, 2015 at 11:11 pmMy father runs a family business and has always said, “those who are willing to take the small stuff (office supplies, candy in stock room for the vending machines, etc.), will soon move onto the larger.” It has happened in the past, so now, if he finds out someone us taking supplies, they are fired. Stealing is stealing.
Michelle S. says
January 3, 2015 at 11:34 pmI agree Lindsay. I definitely think that is stealing.
Liz says
March 26, 2016 at 5:41 pmI’m one of those people who hates to try stuff on in the store and half the time, even if I do, I get home to find it doesn’t match what I thought it would so back it goes. But I didn’t wear it, I just tried it on and the stores I shop at take them back without question, tags still attached. It’s the same thing as ordering stuff online and finding it doesn’t fit. You wouldn’t keep that either. But buying something with the intent of returning it after use is ridiculous. Just rent something!
As far as the movies go, I used to love getting popcorn at the theatre but I now have allergies that don’t allow me to so I will either bring my own snack like I do everywhere else or don’t have anything. I am not stealing if I wasn’t going to buy anything anyway. It’s a movie theatre not a restaurant. They don’t want you to bring your own food because they make more money on you if you buy their inflated price food-stuffs. Actually at this point, movies are so stupidly expensive that I don’t go to them anymore either. I can rent it on DVD at Redbox and not feel bad if it doesn’t live up to the $1.34 or whatever I spent to see it that way. I usually have a coupon for Redbox too 🙂
Hotel shampoos and stuff that you have used but not used up are fair game. It’s kind of wasteful if you don’t take them and use them up. They will just get thrown out anyway. Just leave the linens!
As for tipping, in the US you have to factor in the cost of a tip into your meal. If you don’t have enough for the food you want and a tip either go to the grocery store and make your own meal or order within your means so you can tip properly. Does no one have self control anymore?