Hey everyone! Today’s post will be all about our wedding. I’m looking for ideas and tips to make sure that I am not missing anything. Since we are planning our wedding all by ourselves and are using W’s family’s property as a venue, planning is pretty much all up to us.
We don’t have someone to tell us if we are doing something wrong or if we should be doing something different, because there is no “venue coordinator” for our location. I’m also not interested in hiring someone to plan the whole thing because I would really much rather plan all of the details myself.
Sorry if this post seems like I’m rambling – it’s because I am.
Day of coordinator.
I’m not sure if I will get flack for this, but I do plan on hiring a day-of coordinator so that I don’t have to deal with the craziness of the wedding on the actual wedding day. This person can help arrange the centerpieces, direct everyone with what they should be doing, make sure that everything is on schedule, and so on.
Also, if something happens that is weather-related, they can help fix whatever that problem is and I won’t have to freak out as bad.
Lawn games.
We plan on buying lawn games from Etsy (there are some for sale there that are nice and can be custom-made for your wedding). I do think the lawn games will be fun for wedding guests after the ceremony when we are taking our pictures.
What lawn games would you want to see at a wedding?
Backup plan.
I haven’t really thought of a back up plan. Even if we had a ginormous tent, bad weather could still ruin our plans. We are really hoping for perfect weather, and I know that’s a long shot.
June in Missouri can either mean that it’s nice weather or extremely hot 100 degree days. If it was that hot, we would definitely need air conditioning for our tents. Does anyone have any idea how much this would cost?
We don’t want it to be too muddy, because that of course would create a huge mess.
Also, if it rains too much, then the roads will flood (as they often do whenever it rains), and it would make it impossible to get to the wedding.
So, if anything weather related happened (mainly just rain), then we would have to have backup venue. Of course, this issue arrises with almost any outdoor ceremony and reception, but it still does scare me!
We will have to find a place nearby that would allow us to have an indoor reception at the last moment. Has anyone ever done this? How does the fee usually work out since it’s a backup plan? Or did you just risk the weather and not have a backup plan?
Transportation.
Where we are having our wedding, there is a very long windy road that I hardly ever see cars on, unless it is someone in the family. There is no cell phone service at W’s grandma’s property, so each person calling a taxi would probably not work out. Also, a limo or shuttle might be a little difficult to get back there as well. We do need to think of a ride arrangement just in case anyone is unable to drive after the wedding.
We might have to call a taxi and have it prearranged for them to show up, or designate someone for this job to shuttle people to the nearest hotel.
Food.
I don’t know how many vegetarians will be attending, and we really want catered BBQ at our wedding. What are some vegetarian type foods that we should have? If you are a vegan or vegetarian, what do you like to see at a wedding?
What tips do you have for an outdoor wedding? Anything that you have seen that you did not like?
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Clarisse @MakeMoney Your Way says
Wow Michelle while reading your plans I can now imagine that you will be a perfect bride! We had a garden wedding before but we held it here in our place. My professional singer friends volunteer that they will sing in my wedding day and luckily almost all the visitors really appreciated their talents. And about the backup plan my father prepared for a big tent just in case it will rain and luckily it didn’t. Good luck again and just enjoy the coming days!
Michelle says
Thank you Clarisse! Your wedding sounds like fun 🙂
Liquid says
Outdoor weddings are always fun. I was just at one last weekend. Having it at your fiancé’s family property is a great idea as it will save you a bundle, and make the event less stressful I think. As the bride you will probably have your hands full just talking with people so hiring a coordinator is to be expected 🙂 You can arrange to have a parasol over the gift table, or just have the gift table somewhere indoors in case it rains so all your presents won’t get wet. But hopefully the summer weather will cooperate 😀
Michelle says
Ha everyone thinks it will save us money, but it really doesn’t. We have to rent the bathrooms (there are too many people to only use the 2 bathrooms in the home), tents, tables, chairs, linens and so on!
Matt Becker says
I think a day-of coordinator is a great idea, even if it’s just a friend or family member. You DO NOT want to be dealing with any of that stuff. You just want to be able to enjoy things.
We had cornhole (or bag toss) at our wedding and it was a big hit. You’ve got a picture of it already so I’m guessing that’s on your radar screen. Something original like that is a cool idea.
We also hired a shuttle bus that took people to an from the hotel at a couple of set times. Handling transportation for people is a great idea if you can swing it.
Good luck!
Michelle says
Thank you Matt! I definitely think we will be hiring a coordinator.
Brian says
Can’t go wrong with Corn Hole, Washers and Lawn Darts (if you can find a set). You could also put trivial pursuit cards on the tables for those who want to lounge a little more.
Maybe this is heartless, but if you just have some sort of non-meat sides with your meal, most vegetarians will be fine and eat what they can. If they are vegan, you would probably know and could get something for them, but in the end the cost is probably not worth it and your vegan friends will probably understand, especially if they didn’t let you know ahead of time.
I don’t know if Uber is an option in St Louis, but I think anyone can sign up for it and get their first ride free. So you could ask people to download that app. Uber is pretty much awesomeness.
Michelle says
Those are all great ideas for games! Thank you Brian.
I’m not sure, but I have a feeling that we might have a good amount of vegans or vegetarians, probably at least 10 or 15.
I’ll have to look into Uber. 🙂
FI Pilgrim says
I’m no expert but the day-of coordinator is a must in my opinion. There are so many details to think about, from starting musicians to signaling folks walking down the aisle to gathering groups together for introductions or photos to taking care of “surprises” (and yes, there will be some of those).
The most important thing is to do your best to plan the wedding but don’t worry if things don’t go exactly right. A wedding coordinator can help ease your mind so that you can enjoy your special day.
Michelle says
Yes, I definitely don’t want to deal with all of the little details of the wedding, so we will probably hire someone.
Mike Collins says
BBQ at a wedding?? I would so crash if I lived anywhere nearby! haha
The coordinator is a good idea…we got married at a reception hall and we had a dedicated coordinator to help us with anything we needed. My mom didn’t like the fish so he got her some chicken, the sun was in our eyes so he adjusted the blinds, etc. It’s good to have someone take care of little details and keep everything on track…you want to be free to enjoy yourself!
Michelle says
Haha that is what everyone keeps telling us. BBQ is the BEST! 🙂
Kali @ CommonSenseMillennial says
On the day of coordinator: I think this is a WONDERFUL idea. We didn’t have one and I thought between me, my husband, and my mom (who worked the most on planning with me), we could handle everything, but understandably I completely blanked on what I was supposed to do next a couple of times. This is the biggest thing I wish I could change about our wedding.
Lawn games: Great idea! We had corn hole boards at our wedding and they were a huge hit.
Food: As a vegetarian, I think having something like a salad and cheese/veggie plates would be a good idea. Those will go well as sides to anyone wanting BBQ, and vegetarians can make a meal out of that plus something like rolls that you might also serve with the meat. You could also consider a pretty plain pasta dish to please picky eaters.
Michelle says
Thank you Kali!
Hayley @ A Disease Called Debt says
Wow, those pictures are gorgeous. I love that pic where the bridesmaid dresses are all different with beading detail on them. Stunning. The outdoor tables in the forest look wonderful too! Definitely something to inspire you there!
Transport wise, we arranged a minibus to turn up at a certain time and deliver people to their hotels. We weren’t sure how many of our guests would need it but it was all fine in the end. Getting someone you know to transport guests is a really good option.
I think lawn games are a great idea – how about bowls, mini golf, archery or giant jenga?!
Michelle says
Yes, I love those bridesmaids dresses also! And the outdoor tables make me swoon 🙂
Alexa says
I love the first picture – very cute. I wish I could give you some suggestions but my wedding experience is limited. My exhusband and I didn’t even have a real wedding. Judging by your inspirations pics though your wedding will be beautiful!
Michelle says
Thank you Alexa!
This Life On Purpose says
I think having a day-of coordinator makes sense. You don’t want to have to be running around and stressing about whether things are going smoothly, you want to enjoy your day!
As for lawn games, you should do Bocce ball! You could also try Ladder ball or Beanbag throw. Or Horseshoe throwing?
Looks like your planning is well underway!
Michelle says
All great games! I’ll have to look into buying those 🙂
Jacki F says
I DEFINITELY recommend a Day Of Coordinator. My husband (of one month–yay!) was hesitant to spend the money ($600 in DC) but as the day got closer and he saw the amount of stuff that needed to be set up, he was so glad we spent the money. An alternative, that I read about on another blog (http://www.yourmoderncouple.com/blog/2013/05/22/wedding-wednesday-how-to-decorate-your-wedding-without-being-there/) is to have a house party. Basically, ask some close, trusted friends to arrive early and set up. Regardless, I followed this bloggers organization method for the DOC and everything was set up exactly as I requested.
In terms of weather, check out YoungHouseLove.com — they did a backyard wedding and I’m sure there are tips about weather in the archives.
FOOD! For the vegetarians, I suggest: Mac & Cheese, Cucumber Salad — red onions, sliced cucumbers, chopped mint, oil vinegar and mustard (YUM and so refreshing), Three Bean Salad, Grilled Veggie Skewers. They are definite crowd-pleasers for veggie and non-veggie eaters!
Michelle says
Thank you for all of this Jacki! You are a lifesaver 🙂
Shannon @Financially Blonde says
I agree with your plan for a day of coordinator. You will have enough going on and don’t want to be fixated on the details. As far as transportation, you could always rent one or two mini vans for the day and designate one or two drivers to transport people if needed. As far as food, at the end of the day, it is your day and if someone has a specific eating preference, it is not your obligation to “cater” to them. That being said, a salad bar at a wedding is always a great thing for vegans and people conscious of their weight.
Michelle says
Thank you Shannon!
Mrs PoP says
Sounds like your wedding will be like my BFF’s! Theirs was at a rented farm in MD in the summer. Games included giant Jenga, kickball, hula hoops, croquet and probably more. Mostly try just asked friends and family to bring what they had.
As for vegetarians, we love it when we’re asked ahead of time if we eat meat. We don’t like to be a bother, but an affair that goes on for hours and hours where you’re expected to subside on dinner rolls and iceberg lettuce is misery! Let vegetarians say so on their RSVP, and then see if you can get a fixed number of vegetarian entrees prepared and delivered the day of. Maybe roast vegetable sandwiches if everyone else will be eating pulled pork sandwiches?
Michelle says
Sounds like we need giant Jenga!
Great idea for the vegetarian food. Thank you Mrs. PoP 🙂
Whitney @ EHFAR says
I had an outdoor wedding! We got lucky with the weather because it rained everyday for two weeks, except that one. My venue was a mansion in the historic district. We had the ceremony in the garden, along with the cocktail hour. The reception was inside. Our backup plan for if it rained was moving it inside. Our backup plan was easy, since it was on the same site.
We didn’t have problem with transportation, but parking was more of an issue, since there wasn’t a parking lot next to it. They had to park in a parking garage or along the street. It wasn’t bad though.
We didn’t have a day of coordinator or lawn games, so I don’t have any advice on those.
We had a local restaurant cater our food; Southern comfort style. For the appetizers, we had mini sandwiches, asparagus cheese roll, meat trays, and cheese trays. For the main course, we had: pot roast, baked chicken, green beans (southern style), mashed potatoes, and macaroni and cheese. My husband’s aunt is a vegetarian. She was fine with the macaroni and cheese.
Michelle says
Your wedding sounds wonderful 🙂 Thanks for sharing your food options as well.
Dee @ Color Me Frugal says
Bocce ball and croquet would be fun at a wedding! I also think that hiring a day-of coordinator would be a FABULOUS idea- it drove me nuts on our wedding day that everyone and their dog had to ask me questions about everything! It was just mentally exhausting and it would have been way better for there to be a different go-to person other than the bride!
Michelle says
Yes, it definitely sounds like I will be hiring someone. Thanks!
Ashlee says
I ended up not having a back up plan for my outdoor wedding. I was bound and determined to get down that aisle outside, whether it meant I would be holding an umbrella and slinging mud. LOL! Thank God that didn’t have to happen. The day of the wedding I had a friend as my “coordinator”. She made sure the music was on time, the wedding party knew what was going on, she did my announcing for the first dance and cake cutting. I loved having her do it because I could be straight up with her about what I wanted and she made sure it got done. I also had BBQ at my wedding and it was a HIT! I didn’t even think about vegetarians (oops) because to be honest, I don’t really know anyone who is. Just remember, this day is all about you and W! 🙂
Michelle says
Haha I’m so glad it didn’t rain at your wedding! I am honestly terrified. It’s probably a 25% chance that the weather will ruin our wedding.
Jason B says
I’m sorry I don’t have any advice. I have been in four weddings as a groomsman. In 2 of them the bride was stressing before the wedding. I would suggest you make sure someone helps you with the plans. Good luck.
Michelle says
Thanks Jason!
Michelle's Finance Journal says
Day of coordinator is a must. Just make sure you get a good one and that she/he understands thoroughly what you want.
I’m not a vegetarian, but I love anything with rice and pasta. Maybe you can do some kind of rice patties with veggies?
Michelle says
Great idea. Thanks!
Angela Wadsworth says
Hi Michelle:
We did all our planning ourselves. It is alot of work. A coordinator is definitely worth it.
On the shuttle, our college son has an exchange where his friends pay him a fee to shuttle them back and forth from parties so they can drink and not drive. It works great as long as it is someone you can trust not to drink!
The lawn games are great. You can bring them inside if the weather gets bad. They are alot of fun and you can play without people you don’t even know and it is still fun!
Make sure the tents have walls in case of bad weather.
Vegans like Quinoa. It’s a high protein meal and can be paired with vegetables, sauce, etc. and it is really good.
One big thing, make sure you take a breath and look around during the day. If not, you won’t remember anything once it’s over.
You’ll be great!
Michelle says
Thank you Angela! Great tips 🙂
Michelle says
Thank you Anna!
Meredith says
I agree with the day of coordinator. I was just married a few weeks ago and mine was an absolute lifesaver! She was totally worth every penny that we paid her. She took the stress off me and my family when it came to setting up, arranging the vendors and getting us through all of the traditional reception stuff like cake cutting, first dance, and all of the toasts. As long as you budget for a coordinator then that’s all that really matters!
Michelle says
That is so good to hear!
Michelle says
I have looked at weddingbee before. I need to head back over to their forums. Thanks for the reminder!
Elspeth says
RE: Day of coordinator: GOOD. No one should give you flack for this. A day of coordinator is worth their weight in GOLD in the amount of sanity they will give you on a day that should be all about you and your husband-to-be. This one person will be responsible for making sure you’re paying attention to just what matters, your commitment, instead of any minor thing that might go wrong.
Lawn games: bocce is fun! I like the sandbags game you showed a picture of (can’t remember if it has an official name).
Michelle says
Thank you!
Anne @ Unique Gifter says
Croquet! (With the actual rules, because lots of people don’t know them).
Corn hole
Bocce
Lawn darts… man I wish those weren’t illegal.
Michelle says
Haha thanks Anne!
Pinky says
Hiring a day of planner is the BEST thing you can do and spend money on, trust me. I’m sure ladies that didn’t will say they didn’t need them, but having someone as the point person instead of you is KEY! I spent good money on my two ladies and they were amazing. Don’t stress yourself out with people asking questions and let someone else worry about things going wrong. I learned about three things after the wedding was over that didn’t matter much but if I knew during the day would have freaked!
Your wedding, YOUR MONEY, your food choice. It’s nice to be considerate but if you love bbq get your flippin bbq. There will be plenty of sides and honestly, if they know it’s bbq I’m SURe they will eat something before coming to the wedding. It’s your day love bug!
xoxo
Michelle says
Thank you! We are definitely going to hire a coordinator.
Ney @ ShopaholicSavers.com says
I love the lawn games idea!
Michelle says
Thanks!
Tara @ Streets Ahead Living says
I love backyard weddings and I love barbecue but please have vegetables at your reception! The last wedding I was at had barbecue but the only vegetable was corn, and that’s technically a grain so no go. I eat meat but I also eat a lot of vegetables, so a nice mixed salad would have been perfect.
Have you thought about wedding insurance? Might help with the weather situation.
Michelle says
We will definitely keep all of that in mind. I want a wide range of food.
Hmm what would wedding insurance cover?
Nilda says
Day of coordinator was completely worth it! She helped keep everything running smoothly and that just made us feel calm on our day. She also had an assistant who helped set up our reception venue. Seriously one if the best decisions I made for my wedding!
Michelle says
Good to hear!
Jane says
Just returned from my cousin’s wedding, which took place outdoors with an indoor reception. They had lawn games including giant jenga sets (made from 2×4 remnants), bags/ corn hole, connect 4, and they also had a fire pit where people could sit and kids could make smokes. Bocce Ball might be another nice lawn game to add.
Definitely hire or designate a close friend as coordinator and also make plans for the clean-up afterwards. Everyone will be tired and you don’t want your older family members to have to clean up all the mess in the wee hours of the morning.
A friend of mine rented 15 passenger vans and paid coworkers to transport wedding guest back and forth to their hotels.
Michelle says
I definitely want a fire pit. Thank you Jane!
Michelle says
Yay thank you so much Catherine!
Little House says
I think a day-of coordinator is an excellent idea since you’re having your wedding at a relative’s house. They can handle all the details and prep that day. As for games, keep it easy. Your guests can find ways to entertain themselves with enough appetizers, drinks, and maybe music. Hopefully the weather will play along since that will be the one element you have little control over but could potentially impact the wedding the most. Just have a back-up plan in place – such as a tent or room.
Michelle says
Thanks! We will be having a tent, but if the weather was bad then a tent wouldn’t help at all. I will have to look into space somewhere else for our backup plan.
Stefanie @ The Broke and Beautiful Life says
Vegetarian here! First of all, thank you for considering those guests. It sucks to get stuck eating cornbread all night. I recommend some grilled veggies to stick with the bbq theme and maybe a bean salad or pasta salad to go with it.
Michelle says
Great! We will definitely do that 🙂
Kris says
For some reason, at our wedding the catering company did a lot of that stuff – the “Day of Coordinator” stuff. Maybe check to see what is included in the catering services?
Michelle says
Interesting! I don’t think any of the caterers that we are thinking about do that. I don’t know if I would trust a BBQ caterer with a wedding though haha 🙂
Steve says
My only advice is to let things roll off you if they go slightly off track.
We had moments where we stressed out big time because of minor hiccups which we blew up into a big deal (they totally weren’t a big deal). I guess that strive for perfection and execution to the plan made us a bit susceptible to getting stressed if it wasn’t all going to plan.
We laugh about it now thinking how silly it was that we got overwhelmed and stressed about things that didn’t even matter. If we could go back in time and do it again, we would relax more and just let minor glitches (even major ones) just roll off of us!
Michelle says
Good to hear! don’t think we will get too stressed about it. It’s just a party! 🙂
Kayla Magness says
You don’t need to worry so much 🙂 your wedding day will be perfect. My husband and I had an outdoor reception under a huge tent, and it even sprinkled towards the end of the night and it was still perfect. I think corn hole is a great idea, as well as maybe “hillbilly golf”/Frisbee golf, not sure what its actually called 🙂 best of luck to you!!
Michelle says
Haha I’m not too worried. I’m mainly just worried about the fact that there’s a large chance that it will flood on our wedding day.
Emily @ Urban Departures says
You’re wedding plans sounds so lovely! I love the idea of the lawn games and a BBQ meal. I am usually asked by friends to be their day of coordinator; do you have a type A organized friend you can enlist?
Michelle says
I’m actually the type A friend in my group haha, so I will have to hire a professional.
chelsea says
your wedding inspiration is beautiful! i know your wedding will turn out great! as far as games, i always like bacci ball or the ladder game (not sure of the technical game but you have a rope with balls on either end and you try to throw it on the ladder on the other end of the yard). also, we had a ‘host’ and ‘hostess’ at our wedding. not someone we hired but good family friends who made sure everything ran smoothly. got everyone their flowers, boutonnieres, told people when to walk down the aisle. they were our saving grace that day! we got them a large gift card as a thank you.
Emily @ evolvingPF says
We had an outdoor backyard reception and I’ve attended one other backyard wedding. Definitely think carefully about the weather. If there is any chance of rain you need a shelter on-site or a backup location. For our reception in SoCal we were confident there would be no rain but the sun was brutal, so alone with our tables we rented umbrellas to provide shade. They looked pretty cool, actually.
Michelle says
A Day of Coordinator is worth the money! My friend got married this year and honestly she was super stressed out. If she had to manage the day of I think she would have harmed one of us. Love the pics. Corn Hole is a must. Croquet, darts…It’s great that you have a back up plan. There’s nothing worse than a bride and groom getting rained on and them being surprised when it happens! Your wedding will be beautiful.
Misty Mann says
Wow! Wow! Wow!
What an amazing location you have chosen for the wedding. The trees in the background are looking awesome.
Lisa E. says
I think it’s worth it to hire a day-of coordinator. I’m going to be one (of three) day-of coordinators for my friends’ wedding this Saturday and there is A LOT of things that are happening all at once and you don’t want to be worrying about that kind of stuff on your big day!
Jack @ Enwealthen says
Sounds like you have everything under control.
Our wedding was outdoors but at a venue that had an indoor option. Given that it was raining all week except our day made us glad we had that backup plan.
You already have tents, so I wouldn’t worry about it too much, but if you’re absolutely set on it, try the local fraternal organizations – Lions, Rotary, Fire Dept, etc. – they often have halls that they rent out for very reasonable rates. Just be aware that by having this option you’ve just increased your coordination overhead by 40% or so. Personally, I’d take my chances with the tents and the mud. Worst case you have some funny stories to reminisce over when Uncle Rupert slipped in the mud and took Aunt Betty down with him…
Ashling says
HI there long term lurker here.
Your wedding sounds lovely. I’m from Ireland and even in the summer an outdoor wedding is likely to be rained on. However a lot of people are doing marquee/tent weddings now. What they do to avoid the mud is to use some kind of outdoor matting to create a path to the tent and lay an area by the entrance that is mud free. They often use tea lights to decorate the edges of the path so even in the dark people can follow it and it looks really pretty. i think mason jar lanterns are so pretty and if you have a coordinator they can keep them lit. You could also set up a small covered area to one side of the tent using a gazebo for people who want a breather from the tent/music.