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Stay at home husband

September 12, 2011 BY Michelle Schroeder-Gardner - 9 Comments

This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my disclosure for more info.

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DailyWorth awhile back had a great article titled “My Stay-at-home Husband isn't a Loser.”

Yahoo also had a great article about this. 

My BF isn't exactly a stay at home husband, but I make the bigger income, and I most likely always will.  This has caused problems for many other people who don't understand.  Many people still believe that the man should be taking care of the woman and blah blah blah. However, I make more money than nearly every man I know (every man my age at least).

BUT, what I want to tell people is that I am independent! I can take care of myself.

Anyways, more and more men are staying home to be a stay at home dad, and more and more men are making less money than their spouses.  This is the new normal, and should be accepted!

What do you think about stay at home dads or husbands that make less? I feel like this should be an obvious conversation about how men and women should be considered equal with no biases, but you never know.

Also, before I forgot there was also an interesting article on LearnVest the other day about Money Mic: Why I Want to Marry Rich. It's pretty interesting, I'd take a look at it.

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9 Comments
Filed Under: Budget Tagged With: Home, Life

About Michelle Schroeder-Gardner

Michelle is the founder of Making Sense of Cents, a blog about personal finance and traveling. She discusses how her business has evolved in her side income series. She paid off $40,000 in student loans by the age of 24 mainly due to her freelancing side hustles. Click here to learn more about starting a blog!

Comments

  1. Antie Eboo says

    September 12, 2011 at 3:55 am

    Hubby and I make roughly the same amount of money right now, but at times, my income is definately higher. It will continue to climb higher with room for advancement, his will not. My ultimate goal will be to make enough money for us to live on my income alone, and let him stay home and do all the child-rearing and household tasks. He's better suited to it than I am anyway. 🙂

    Reply
  2. BTHappyHomeowner says

    September 12, 2011 at 4:04 am

    Wow…thanks for that last article link. I'm amazed at how candid she is, and I think the article itself brings up a host of topics for discussion. Right out of the gate, I think she makes a lot of sense, although I cringe when she uses the word "rich" as I feel it has so many negative (and obvious positive) connotations attached to it. While I applaud her boldness, I wonder how she behaves in the real world, when she's not protected by pseudonyms and anonymous Internet articles. This observation would allow me to make a more definitive judgement. Add to all of this that I do agree with her about the bit of family stability, travel, etc and you'll see that I'm absolutely flopping back & forth with this! :pWhat were your thoughts?

    Reply
  3. Michelle P says

    September 12, 2011 at 4:11 am

    @Antie Eboo, I'm pretty much in the same situation. His income will increase but not as fast as mine, and not nearly as high as mine will be in a couple of years. He does most of the household tasks right now, as I cringe whenever I have to do anything. Our ultimate goal would be for us to live on my income alone also, and for him to stay home.My thoughts were pretty much the same. Yes money does bring stability but I do wonder how she is in the real world. A lot of people commented on the article (just like as what you said) about how she's hiding with her name or eyes not being shown. I also think it's interesting that she calls herself a feminist, when not everything aligns with this belief.

    Reply
  4. jamie says

    September 12, 2011 at 8:41 am

    well, i think nothing less of them! currently i am the "stay at home wife" but its mostly because im currently in school. we have planned for him to take some time off after i graduate and land a good paying job. however, these roles of stay at home whatevers often come with negative connotations and i don't see why? not that raising a family with working parents cant be done, but someone has to raise the kids besides the nanny, right? i say, more power to you stay at home spouses! xx

    Reply
  5. Niki says

    September 12, 2011 at 9:14 am

    I was always taught to take care of myself and never depend on a man. Although here I am married to a sailor and the stay at home mom. But before children entered the picture I was the bread winner and my husband had no problem with that either. I really believe if my husband didn't have a career in the military, he would have easily/willingly been the stay at home dad while I pursued my career path. It just didn't work out that way, you can't really quit that job.It's interesting that people would give such flack to a man not making as much as a woman, but these are probably the same people who think women abandoned their post as mothers when they entered the workforce. Or that they can't make the financial decisions for a family.We live in a small backwoods town and we first moved here people(men) had a problem me setting up services or inquiring about home repair. Most men asked if they would be or could talk to my husband. It made finding a contractor easy. Don't mention my husband in our conversation and you're hired.

    Reply
  6. Serendipity says

    September 12, 2011 at 2:01 pm

    I would love a house husband! only because I hate cleaning and cooking and stuff. Rambo has started cooking at home more often which is nice because he gets off earlier then I do and I love coming home to something to eat.

    Reply
  7. South County Girl says

    September 12, 2011 at 3:15 pm

    My husband makes less than me… and he's okay with it and so am I. Its the 21st century… its time for people to really take a look and see the other side.

    Reply
  8. Stephanie says

    September 13, 2011 at 3:34 am

    As long as those men pull their weight at home with the cooking and cleaning and childrearing, I think anyone who has a problem with that scenerio is stuck in the dark ages. 😛 Like many of the ladies who commentd already, I'm the main breadwinner. My husband, while he doesn't make as much, has an infinitely more flexible schedule that is better suited to being the primary caregiver without having to give up his income entirely. He works as a substitute teacher during the day, he does some freelance writing, and he's a comedian (he originally got into comedy to try to get writing jobs, but as it turns out he enjoys it and people are willing to pay him to do it!). It would be much, much easier (and have less of a negative financial impact) for him to adjust his schedule for childrearing than it would be for me. I'd have to quit my 9-5 altogether, leaving us with much less money and no health insurance, whereas he could cut down on how many days a week he subs, but he could also focus on taking on more writing and/or comedy jobs to make up the difference. It also doesn't hurt that he's a fantastic cook, though if he became a stay-at-home dad I think we'd have to work on his cleaning skills. 😉

    Reply
  9. Michelle P says

    September 14, 2011 at 4:02 am

    I agree Jamie, I wish they didn't come with the negative connotations. In my BF's extended family, there are 2 stay at home dads, and a lot of people give them flack for it.@Niki, that's usually a determining factor for me also when it comes to home repair. When they ask for the BF and won't talk to me, then they've immediately lost my business.

    Reply

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Hello and welcome!
My name is Michelle and I'm the author/owner of Making Sense of Cents. Learning how to save money and make more money changed my life. It allowed me to pay off $40,000 in student loans, start my own business, and I now travel full-time.
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